much of the same

I ran errands today..........talked to the attorney......... went out for lunch (mexican), and went shopping. I bought an exercise bike. I hate the treadmill.........so I thought I'd try the bike. I also got a portable cd player so that i can listen to my music while exercising without bothering those around me. I'm using it now........listening to the dixie chicks as i type. :O)

A court date for the child support motification has been set. I started shaking when I found out. I hate this crap.............I've put it off for years ..............it's time to face up to it and then move beyond it.........

Thur.

It's been snowing all afternoon and evening......................it would be the perfect evening to cozy up with my boyfriend...............but we won't because it's not something we do anymore, ever.

The basketball game was cancelled because of the weather. It's been snowing all afternoon and evening..............I hope it buries the city making it impossible to get to work tomorrow. :O)

I'm going to bed. I like it there. It's where I can visit that perfect little world that exists only in my head.

Off Day

It's freezing cold here.................it's the type of cold that hurts. I wish I was in Miami.

Did anyone go outside and look at the moon lastnight? It was orangish, red. I got daughter out of bed so she could see it. She pretended to be impressed........... ...oh well, it was pretty.

Today's my off day. I have to balance my checkbook, go to the bank, and pay some bills. Tonight I'm going to daughters basketball game. They're going to perform a dance that she put together. Tomorrow night she's having the cheerleading squad spend the night. "Come on mom, it's only 10 girls!" I had no good reason to say no....................so yesterday we went shopping for stuff for the party. The Varsity squad has a competition Saturday morning. So daughter and the rest of the JV squad are going to spend the evening making signs for the competition. She puts her heart into all of this stuff.......so hopefully most of the girls will show up.

american idol

I watched American Idol tonight..................Jason was my favorite.........the show as a whole sucked.......so we'll see. Randy Jacksons teeth were so yellow it looked like he'd been sucking on cheese puffs. DOG! Brush your damn teeth!

on being a parent

As a parent you have moments when you feel so inept......and guilty, and you wonder if you've just totally screwed things up for you child, or maybe you've just screwed up your child........and you mentally beat yourself up....and you replay all those critical moments in your head and wonder if you should have handled it differently................................................and then there's a new day...............and your child hugs you, and they say just the right thing in reference to the latest drama ... and you realize things are ok....and you think that perhaps you didn't handle the situation so poorly after all, and maybe you're not such a bad parent.

The only thing I know in this life with absolute certainty is that I love my kids..

Crap...

ExHusband called me yesterday. He's pissed that I went to the child support office and even more pissed that I won't just go along with his plan to lower the child support. He made some empty threats....then tried hurting me with words....... he ended the "conversation" with "I'll see you in court!" Seems to be his way of ending a conversation with me. I hate this crap!

PS

Ex-boyfriend sent me a Valentine Day card. He signed it "Happy Valentine's Day to my favorite ex-girlfriend. Love you. B."
It made me smile.
It's nice when you can be friends with an X love.

flat tire and snow day

My front tire blew out on my way home from work. I was on the Big Mac bridge when it happened, during rush hour, and there's no emergency lane.........so I had to keep driving till I reached an exit.......... I could hear ex-husband yelling "DONT DRIVE ON A FLAT!"................I called boyfriend and asked him to come help, and to hurry cause I was scared some psycho would come abduct and kill me..........................and while I waited for boyfriend to come I prayed that the Good Samaritan van would stop and help. The first person to pull over to offer to help was a young black guy. I told him my boyfriend would be there any second, for him to go on and go. He was nice enough, but I was scared and just wanted him gone. He left without incident................then I saw flashing yellow lights in my rearview mirror. It was the Good Samaritan van! He put air in my spare, took off the flat, and put on the spare........it took all of 3 minutes.......and as he worked, boyfriend showed up. Yay! I wasn't going to die today! The Good Samaritan van doesn't charge for his help, and he doesn't accept tips. So all I could do was say thank you to him, and feel gratitude that such services exist. I'm not sure why my tire blew.....I did notice a couple days ago that it was a little low on air.....maybe that's why it blew?

It's snowing here. Daughter just called from her dads house to tell me school has been closed for tomorrow. Yay! Remember how great it was when you got a snow day from school?

bad day

Bad day here AND I have a headache.


My day, in a nut shell:

Meeting at daughters school to discuss the possibility of her being dyslexic. I've always suspected that something isn't quite right..........I've declared war on the school (they just don't know it yet)............thsi time I'll get legal help..........they will test her whether or not they want to.

Went to child support office...... Filed necessary papers to have enforced a court order that will deduct my childs, child support from Ex-husbands pay check rather than have him pay me directly. ( does that make any sense?) (he's going to be pissed).............I did what I had to do. I DID WHAT I HAD TO DO.

Called my insurance company to drop the coverage I payto insure sons car. He no longer has the car. I was paying 1200/year to insure his car...........................now that he doesnt have a car, the insurance company informs me I must insure him on my car..............guess what it will cost? An additional 1200/year. (blood sucking fuckers!)

Called my bank about a credit card they sent to me. I didn't apply for it. I dont want a credit card. They're a rip off! So I have this card I didn't apply for and I want the bank to tell me WHY! If I cancel the card it will affect my credit report in a negative way.................and having this line of credit will potentially affect my credit in a negative way. So I asked the bank WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO FIX THIS SITUATION?!" "Bridget" from the bank is waiting on "someone" to call her back to tell her what to do to fix this.........and she will call me tomorrow.

Bleached and washed a pair of gym shoes in the washer. I thought "what the hell" and threw a white bra in the washer too..................when I got them out of the washer the gym shoe shoestring was tied/wrapped around the bra strap about a million times and in a million little knots.......................

child support stuff

I left work early today to go see an attorney about the child support issue. I'm not sure how they decide child support in other States, or even in other counties. In this county, in this state, they have a chart of some sort, and based on both parents income and with credit given to the parent who pays health insurance premiums (that would be him) they come up with a figure.........and according to the attorney, based on the info. I gave him, the child support I receive is less than what it should be. That's fine by me. I'm not worried about it..........................so what I'm going to do is nothing. When he calls me to ask about the support being reduced I'll just tell him no. Hopefully he knows he's already ahead of the game and none of this will end up in court. We'll see?

Old Stuff and the Super Bowl

I got the call today that I've been expecting from my ex-husband. I was going about my calm, quiet, life.....minding my business, shopping at Wal-Mart for some storage bins when my cell phone rang.....it was him. He presented his reasons for why he thought the child support should be reduced, said we could resolve the issue ourselves, or in court......my choice.


I didn't discuss the issue with him. We will never see eye to eye in regards to child support. Never.



All along I've accepted 50% of what the courts say I'm entitled. Otherwise he would have initiated proceedings to try and take custody of our kids. I didn't want to put my kids through that.....the divorce was difficult enough for them........


I hate this shit. I hate dealing with it and all of the feelings that go along with it..........especially the anger and fear...............


My sons are going to watch the Super Bowl with me, daughter, and boyfriend. It has become a tradition since the divorce that we watch the game together. Since I don't really follow football I usually go with the under dog/////so I'll be rooting for the Giants......Go Giants!.............but the fun part for me is cooking and preparing snacks for the boys, watching the commercials, and watching the half time show.

I love nursing. I know I complain a lot about my job and my professiion. But truth be told, I love what I do......and it's one of the things I'm really good at doing....................on the other hand, I'm pretty tired of it..........I'm seriously thinking about going back to school and starting over in a whole new profession.