Our medical director, Dr. P, called me the other day and asked if I was staying on with the new company. He said he wanted me to stay, he liked my work, and he would tell the new owners. Made me feel good.
To my ex from PA.......fuck you, you big baby!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
rambling
I really don't know what to talk about on here anymore. Seems like everything in my life lately has been depressing, and revolves around illness and death........except for the new kitty, and winning the child support hearing........and seeing the cute little brown bear in the mountains.
I suppose I live a relatively boring life. I think after the dust from my divorce settled, which took a couple of years, I've tried really hard to keep my life low key. I was emotionally beat, and physically worn out. Plus I was afraid that if I had to deal with anymore drama, I just wouldn't make it. I let all of my friends go over the past several years....every single one of them.......some that I had had since grade school.....................I examined every single friendship I had, and I ended them all. I stopped returning/answering calls, and eventually they stopped calling. So I guess you could say I really don't have any friends anymore except for my boyfriend. I mean I have pals at work that I refer to as friends and whom I talk and laugh with and say I'll do dinner with.....but when they invite me out I make excuses.
Some of the time I regret what I've done, but I know I did what I had to do at the time....and now it's habit I suppose.
Lisa and Terri were my oldest of friends. Lisa and I met in the second grade and then Terri came to our school when we were in the third grade. We've almost always been a part of each others lives and have seen each other through marriage, divorce, child birth, nursing school, death of parents, broken relationship, first loves, first sexual experiences, first time high/drunk...acne, skipping school.............everything. ............
At any rate I'm friendless. :O)
Some of the time I miss having close girlfriends.
I'm rambling.
I once had a guy friend who said to me "I like when you ramble."
I loved him. Maybe I'll tell you about him someday.
I suppose I live a relatively boring life. I think after the dust from my divorce settled, which took a couple of years, I've tried really hard to keep my life low key. I was emotionally beat, and physically worn out. Plus I was afraid that if I had to deal with anymore drama, I just wouldn't make it. I let all of my friends go over the past several years....every single one of them.......some that I had had since grade school.....................I examined every single friendship I had, and I ended them all. I stopped returning/answering calls, and eventually they stopped calling. So I guess you could say I really don't have any friends anymore except for my boyfriend. I mean I have pals at work that I refer to as friends and whom I talk and laugh with and say I'll do dinner with.....but when they invite me out I make excuses.
Some of the time I regret what I've done, but I know I did what I had to do at the time....and now it's habit I suppose.
Lisa and Terri were my oldest of friends. Lisa and I met in the second grade and then Terri came to our school when we were in the third grade. We've almost always been a part of each others lives and have seen each other through marriage, divorce, child birth, nursing school, death of parents, broken relationship, first loves, first sexual experiences, first time high/drunk...acne, skipping school.............everything. ............
At any rate I'm friendless. :O)
Some of the time I miss having close girlfriends.
I'm rambling.
I once had a guy friend who said to me "I like when you ramble."
I loved him. Maybe I'll tell you about him someday.
change...dead critters....school
I guess I'm afraid that the new owners at my work won't like me. I know I do a good job, but what if some wicked bitch decides she doesn't like me and makes it her goal in life to get me fired. That kind of stuff happens all the time to people.....................but then I remind myself that if that type thing happens to me, I'll just resign...................and then I remind myself again to just continue to do the best job I can do, stay away from gossip, be positive....and everything will be okay. Right? I'm not so good with change.......I worry about everything.............even when it's what I want.
I had to spray my driveway down when I got home from work. We-Ping has been on a killing spree. I had 3 dead moles and two dead birds in my driveway, plus I had a dead mole on my side porch. It was gross.
Son starts his 4th semester of college in a couple of weeks. It should be his 5th but he took a semester off. I told him to go part time if he wants, but to just do it no matter what...and that he'll never regret it................... he agrees and continues to stick with it.
I had to spray my driveway down when I got home from work. We-Ping has been on a killing spree. I had 3 dead moles and two dead birds in my driveway, plus I had a dead mole on my side porch. It was gross.
Son starts his 4th semester of college in a couple of weeks. It should be his 5th but he took a semester off. I told him to go part time if he wants, but to just do it no matter what...and that he'll never regret it................... he agrees and continues to stick with it.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Friday
Daughter went to cheer camp today and will go tomorrow and Sunday.
They have cute, new, sporty outfits to wear each day.
If my friend Chuck were still alive he'd be jealous of the new outfits....and he'd be wishing he was a cheerleader.
I miss him.....I hope he knew how much I loved him.
I talked to ex-husband today. He regrets going to court over the child support. But only because his attorney fees were greater than the money he will save from the minute child support reduction. I wanted to say I told you so......but I bit my tongue. He's not such a bad guy. Maybe one day we will be friends.
They have cute, new, sporty outfits to wear each day.
If my friend Chuck were still alive he'd be jealous of the new outfits....and he'd be wishing he was a cheerleader.
I miss him.....I hope he knew how much I loved him.
I talked to ex-husband today. He regrets going to court over the child support. But only because his attorney fees were greater than the money he will save from the minute child support reduction. I wanted to say I told you so......but I bit my tongue. He's not such a bad guy. Maybe one day we will be friends.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Joplin
This is our new kitty. She's probably 4 or 5 weeks old. She's really smart, affectionate and playful. Right now she's being bottle fed. She won't take anything solid but she did lick a pork chop bone last evening.. She uses her litter box except for the time she pood in my bed and peed on my pillow.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
work
The new owners of my place of employment officially take over Aug.1. but they had a landscaping crew there today working. I was so happy. Our grounds have been neglected for several months. It looks 100% better already.
We meet with the new owners Thursday to go over our health benefits. Anything they give to us in terms of health benefits will be better than what we presently have................
I'm not going to get too excited about anything until I'm offered a job, and if I'm not offered a job then I'll just get on with my life some place else.
We meet with the new owners Thursday to go over our health benefits. Anything they give to us in terms of health benefits will be better than what we presently have................
I'm not going to get too excited about anything until I'm offered a job, and if I'm not offered a job then I'll just get on with my life some place else.
Monday, July 21, 2008
monday
We went to my aunts funeral today.
It was sad.
I got my new kitty today. She's cute. We named her Joplin.
I took a couple Benadryl a little while ago and it's knocking me out. I'm off to bed.
It was sad.
I got my new kitty today. She's cute. We named her Joplin.
I took a couple Benadryl a little while ago and it's knocking me out. I'm off to bed.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
this n that
Tomorrow's my Aunts funeral. I'm going because my family expects me to be there, and because it's the right thing to do, but that means I'll have to call off work again. So I get to spend the next 2 days worrying about missing work.
My rash continues to improve. Only my back, legs, ear canals, jaw line, scalp, fingers and wrists itch.
Daughter goes back to school in about 3 weeks. I have her sports physical out of the way, her cheerleading fees paid, and her school supplies purchased. All that's left to do is school clothes shop. We'll make a full, fun day out of clothes shopping.
Today I plan to clean up my backyard. A couple weeks ago I cut down about a hundred Honey Suckle trees and they're still out there laying on the ground. It's a mess and I need to clean it up............and since scrawy boy didn't come back to cut the grass I need to do that too.
My rash continues to improve. Only my back, legs, ear canals, jaw line, scalp, fingers and wrists itch.
Daughter goes back to school in about 3 weeks. I have her sports physical out of the way, her cheerleading fees paid, and her school supplies purchased. All that's left to do is school clothes shop. We'll make a full, fun day out of clothes shopping.
Today I plan to clean up my backyard. A couple weeks ago I cut down about a hundred Honey Suckle trees and they're still out there laying on the ground. It's a mess and I need to clean it up............and since scrawy boy didn't come back to cut the grass I need to do that too.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Friday
There was a little scrawny blond haired boy at my front door today. He asked if I wanted him to cut my grass. "I do it for 10 dollars." I talked to him for a few minutes. He was the type of kid that you just know doesn't get the attention he needs from his parents. But he was a likeable little guy.....even though I knew he was probably trouble...........and any kid who offers to work impresses me. So after a couple minutes he asks me "how's Danny?" Danny is my middle son and I was surprised the little boy knew him. He explains to me that Danny taught him how to fight and how he hasn't lost a fight since then. I tell him that maybe it's best to walk away rather than fight. He responds by saying he does walk away unless he is hit first.
Later when I talked to my son Danny about my little visitor, Danny explained that the boy is a foster child to his bestfriends grandmother, that he is unsupervised most of the time, and that he taught the boy how to fight because he was getting his butt kicked daily because he is so little.
I'll call his grandma for permission for the boy to cut my grass. I mean if he's working there's less time for him to get into trouble.......and it may help his self esteem. I just feel sorry for the kid. He looks like he's 9 but he's 14 years old. So we'll see how it goes.
My poison ivy is a little better today. I've been using a prescription steroid cream. Only 95% of my body itches about 96% of the time.
I've adopted a new kitten. The social worker at one of our sister facilities called my DON trying to find a home for a homeless kitten she found in the bushes in her front yard.. My DON called me, I said yes.......and so I get the kitty Monday. I wonder if We-Ping will like having a little kitty around.
Later when I talked to my son Danny about my little visitor, Danny explained that the boy is a foster child to his bestfriends grandmother, that he is unsupervised most of the time, and that he taught the boy how to fight because he was getting his butt kicked daily because he is so little.
I'll call his grandma for permission for the boy to cut my grass. I mean if he's working there's less time for him to get into trouble.......and it may help his self esteem. I just feel sorry for the kid. He looks like he's 9 but he's 14 years old. So we'll see how it goes.
My poison ivy is a little better today. I've been using a prescription steroid cream. Only 95% of my body itches about 96% of the time.
I've adopted a new kitten. The social worker at one of our sister facilities called my DON trying to find a home for a homeless kitten she found in the bushes in her front yard.. My DON called me, I said yes.......and so I get the kitty Monday. I wonder if We-Ping will like having a little kitty around.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
life
Boyfriend was discharged from the hospital today. The cardiologist put him on an anticoagulant and will do some out patient testing. I'm happy he's ok. I was worried sick about him.
My aunt passed away today. I loved her and the memories of the times we spent with her family from when I was a child..........but we probably really only visited with her twice a year...........much less since I've been an adult.............mostly I just feel bad for my dad and for my Aunts adult children. I can't imagine losing a sibling or a parent.
My rash isn't any better. Every inch of my body is covered. Son says I have poison ivy. I itch so bad I'm ready to pull my hair out and scream. I've been taking Benadryl. It helps the itch a little, but mostly is just makes me want to sleep. I think I need some steroids. I'll call my doctor tomorrow.
My place of employment was sold. This time it's for real. I hope. I should know by the first or second week of August if I'll still have a job. I really don't care one way or the other. I will miss some of my co-workers though.
My aunt passed away today. I loved her and the memories of the times we spent with her family from when I was a child..........but we probably really only visited with her twice a year...........much less since I've been an adult.............mostly I just feel bad for my dad and for my Aunts adult children. I can't imagine losing a sibling or a parent.
My rash isn't any better. Every inch of my body is covered. Son says I have poison ivy. I itch so bad I'm ready to pull my hair out and scream. I've been taking Benadryl. It helps the itch a little, but mostly is just makes me want to sleep. I think I need some steroids. I'll call my doctor tomorrow.
My place of employment was sold. This time it's for real. I hope. I should know by the first or second week of August if I'll still have a job. I really don't care one way or the other. I will miss some of my co-workers though.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
wed
I got up to get ready for work this morning and boyfriend said he wanted to go to the hospital.
He had an irregular heart beat. He's the type who could accidentally cut off his leg and insist he'd be fine if I'd just get him a bandaid. So I knew he had to be feeling pretty awful. I replaced myself for work and went with him to the ER.
They admitted him with atrial fib and started him on heparin.
All of his family and friends are in Colorado. He probably feels alone and is scared. He'll be ok but
I replaced myself from work tomorrow so that I could spend the day with him. He'll probably be released tomorrow and scheduled for more tests.
I didn't sleep well lastnight. I was itching. Actually my scalp was itching. Some of the time when I'm in bed watching tv my daughter and her girlfriend come in and lay in the bed with me, or we sit on the bed and talk. I remember thinking "I wonder if daughters friend had lice and got them on my bed and now I have them. When I got out of bed this morning every place on my body was covered with a rash. It's an itchy, blistery, red rash.....everywhere. And I have chills. I think it's an allergic reaction. The only thing I've taken that I've never taken before is a Zantac. I took one lastnight. I look like a freak, and I feel like I'm in hell. Benadryl isn't doing much to help. I may need to see a doctor.
He had an irregular heart beat. He's the type who could accidentally cut off his leg and insist he'd be fine if I'd just get him a bandaid. So I knew he had to be feeling pretty awful. I replaced myself for work and went with him to the ER.
They admitted him with atrial fib and started him on heparin.
All of his family and friends are in Colorado. He probably feels alone and is scared. He'll be ok but
I replaced myself from work tomorrow so that I could spend the day with him. He'll probably be released tomorrow and scheduled for more tests.
I didn't sleep well lastnight. I was itching. Actually my scalp was itching. Some of the time when I'm in bed watching tv my daughter and her girlfriend come in and lay in the bed with me, or we sit on the bed and talk. I remember thinking "I wonder if daughters friend had lice and got them on my bed and now I have them. When I got out of bed this morning every place on my body was covered with a rash. It's an itchy, blistery, red rash.....everywhere. And I have chills. I think it's an allergic reaction. The only thing I've taken that I've never taken before is a Zantac. I took one lastnight. I look like a freak, and I feel like I'm in hell. Benadryl isn't doing much to help. I may need to see a doctor.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Friday
A co-worker asked me yesterday if I bleach my teeth. I don't. I think it's funny she asked. I had an appoinment with my dentist today and planned on asking him about it. So............
I went to the dentist first thing this morning. It was just a follow up appointment. I asked him about teeth whitening. I'm going to wait and have it done in October. His office knocks a hundred dollars off the price of teeth whitening Nov thru Dec. He said he'd give me the sale price in Oct. @ my next appointment. Yay!
After my dentist appointment I went out to breakfast with my boyfriend, to the grocery, to put gas in my car, and finally to the bank. I'm not doing anything else today. As a matter of fact, I came home and put on my pajamas.
Daughter goes to a summer day camp most of the summer. She helps out with the younger children, and participates in the activities geared towards the older kids. She's not usually home until after 4p. I kind of miss her. Typically she stays with me for a week, then goes to her dads house for a week. Lately she's been staying with me for a week and two days, then goes to her dads. Plus she stayed with me 4 weeks in a row while dad was out of town. I like it. But today her dad will pick her up from here after he gets off work. She'll come home next Wed. The good thing is that one of her best friends lives 2 doors up from me, and it's who she goes with to the day camp. So I still get to see her everyday. Plus her dad lives right down the street and around the corner. So we're close to each other....and she walks back and forth on any given day.
All of the plants I took from the courtyard at work and transplanted to my yard are dying. My corn is waist high, but no corn yet, and my tomato plants don't have any tomatoes yet. I have all the parsley, orageno, and basil you could ask for.....my pumpkins, cantelops, and watermelon plants are growing like crazy. I don't have any beets, carrots,squash or peppers yet. I really don't know what I'm doing I guess. I'll keep trying and learning. Maybe next year I'll do better.
I went to the dentist first thing this morning. It was just a follow up appointment. I asked him about teeth whitening. I'm going to wait and have it done in October. His office knocks a hundred dollars off the price of teeth whitening Nov thru Dec. He said he'd give me the sale price in Oct. @ my next appointment. Yay!
After my dentist appointment I went out to breakfast with my boyfriend, to the grocery, to put gas in my car, and finally to the bank. I'm not doing anything else today. As a matter of fact, I came home and put on my pajamas.
Daughter goes to a summer day camp most of the summer. She helps out with the younger children, and participates in the activities geared towards the older kids. She's not usually home until after 4p. I kind of miss her. Typically she stays with me for a week, then goes to her dads house for a week. Lately she's been staying with me for a week and two days, then goes to her dads. Plus she stayed with me 4 weeks in a row while dad was out of town. I like it. But today her dad will pick her up from here after he gets off work. She'll come home next Wed. The good thing is that one of her best friends lives 2 doors up from me, and it's who she goes with to the day camp. So I still get to see her everyday. Plus her dad lives right down the street and around the corner. So we're close to each other....and she walks back and forth on any given day.
All of the plants I took from the courtyard at work and transplanted to my yard are dying. My corn is waist high, but no corn yet, and my tomato plants don't have any tomatoes yet. I have all the parsley, orageno, and basil you could ask for.....my pumpkins, cantelops, and watermelon plants are growing like crazy. I don't have any beets, carrots,squash or peppers yet. I really don't know what I'm doing I guess. I'll keep trying and learning. Maybe next year I'll do better.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Miami
I'm planning a trip to Miami Beach.
It's one of my favorite places.
It will be a short trip. Maybe 2 or 3 days.
But it will be well worth it.
It's one of my favorite places.
It will be a short trip. Maybe 2 or 3 days.
But it will be well worth it.
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
minus 1
I predict I'll be unemployed by August 14.
I'm not sure where I'm going to go from there or what I'll do.
I should probably be worried or afraid. But I'm not.
What's wrong with me?
When I got home from work the other day there was a bag with something in it on my kitchen counter. I opened the bag and in it was a photo of me and 3 of my sisters from when we were children. My dad had the photo blown up to a 5x7, and framed it. He made one for me and each of my sisters. I don't think he realizes that my oldest sister is not in the photo. I looked at it a couple times before I knew she wasn't in it. I cracked up laughing cause I know she'll be pissed. I called my sister that's a year older than me and told her oldest sisters not in the picture. She died laughing.
It was sweet of my dad to do. He still sends me snail me................and he writes and snail mails the kids too. I think it's cool.
I'm not sure where I'm going to go from there or what I'll do.
I should probably be worried or afraid. But I'm not.
What's wrong with me?
When I got home from work the other day there was a bag with something in it on my kitchen counter. I opened the bag and in it was a photo of me and 3 of my sisters from when we were children. My dad had the photo blown up to a 5x7, and framed it. He made one for me and each of my sisters. I don't think he realizes that my oldest sister is not in the photo. I looked at it a couple times before I knew she wasn't in it. I cracked up laughing cause I know she'll be pissed. I called my sister that's a year older than me and told her oldest sisters not in the picture. She died laughing.
It was sweet of my dad to do. He still sends me snail me................and he writes and snail mails the kids too. I think it's cool.
Monday, July 07, 2008
sweet 16
Daughters 16th birthday is in a couple months. I wanted to do something special for her. I asked her what she wanted to do...........she said something about a bon fire, grill out, slip-n-slide, music, and she wants a bedroom make over again. She can't decide between a boy-girl party or just a girl party. She's leaning towards an all girl party. So am I.
Sunday, July 06, 2008
joy and happiness
I like when I wake in the morning to a quiet house. Middle son is off work today so he is sleeping late. Daughter had a girlfriend spend the night. They always stay up late and then sleep the morning away. So today I woke to a quiet and empty first floor. :O)
I had a dream lastnight. In the dream I was talking to a girl about her bird. I liked the bird and asked her where I could get one. She instructed me to just grab one from the many flying around us. I grabbed 3 of them (I guess I'm greedy) but ended up with just the one. He was pale blue, and some of the time he was yellow. He turned out to be much more than a bird. He was joy and happiness. Thats the only way I know to explain him. So the rest of the dream was about feeling happiness and joy. I woke from the dream still smiling and feeling a sense of well being.
I'm not sure what I'm going to do today. I took 8 plants from the courtyard at work to transplant in my yard. I planted them in my front yard yesterday but I'm not pleased with how they look. t I was thinking about moving them.
And I always try to have a big family dinner on Sundays. With my oldest son gone, and my middle son close behind him, and my daughter busy with her teenage social life, it's my way of bringing the whole family together atleast once a week. Hopefully when they're all out on their own, and have their own families, they will continue to come every Sunday for dinner.
I had a dream lastnight. In the dream I was talking to a girl about her bird. I liked the bird and asked her where I could get one. She instructed me to just grab one from the many flying around us. I grabbed 3 of them (I guess I'm greedy) but ended up with just the one. He was pale blue, and some of the time he was yellow. He turned out to be much more than a bird. He was joy and happiness. Thats the only way I know to explain him. So the rest of the dream was about feeling happiness and joy. I woke from the dream still smiling and feeling a sense of well being.
I'm not sure what I'm going to do today. I took 8 plants from the courtyard at work to transplant in my yard. I planted them in my front yard yesterday but I'm not pleased with how they look. t I was thinking about moving them.
And I always try to have a big family dinner on Sundays. With my oldest son gone, and my middle son close behind him, and my daughter busy with her teenage social life, it's my way of bringing the whole family together atleast once a week. Hopefully when they're all out on their own, and have their own families, they will continue to come every Sunday for dinner.
Saturday, July 05, 2008
dead things
I found this on my front porch this morning. We-Ping catches one everyday in the summer. She usually leaves them in the driveway for me to find when I get home from work. I've been doing some planting in the front yard and so I think that's why she left this one in the front. It always makes me smile and grosses me out all at the same time.
Friday, July 04, 2008
happy 4th
I worked today. That means double time and a half. Yay! After work I stopped off at the grocery to buy steaks for a grill out this evening with my family. I ran inot my middle son on my way home. He was skipping the grill out for a date with some chick named "Sabrina." Oldest son backed out of the grill out to go to the motorcycle show at the Levee. Daughter decided to grill out with her friend/our neighbor.............and boyfriend wasn't feeling well so he backed out.
I'm a little relieved. I'm tired. Sitting back and just relaxing with We-Ping sounds good to me.
The 4th of July used to be a big deal at our house. When I was married we'd spend a small fortune on fireworks. We always took our vacation the last week of June and the first week of July. We'd stop in Tenn. on our way home from the ocean to buy the fireworks. Our favorite thing to buy was the roll of 100,000 firecrackers. Or maybe it was 500,000. We'd start unrolling it at the bottom of our street and it covered the whole length of our street. We'd light it for the finale, the firecracker roll........and it was after the firecracker roll that the police would show up. They were always nice though... All of our neighbors, friends and family would come to our house on the 4th. We didn't send out invitations. Everyone just knew to come, and each year more and more people would show up. We'd grill, have drinks, listen to great music..........and then at dark we'd do the fireworks. It was fun.
I'm a little relieved. I'm tired. Sitting back and just relaxing with We-Ping sounds good to me.
The 4th of July used to be a big deal at our house. When I was married we'd spend a small fortune on fireworks. We always took our vacation the last week of June and the first week of July. We'd stop in Tenn. on our way home from the ocean to buy the fireworks. Our favorite thing to buy was the roll of 100,000 firecrackers. Or maybe it was 500,000. We'd start unrolling it at the bottom of our street and it covered the whole length of our street. We'd light it for the finale, the firecracker roll........and it was after the firecracker roll that the police would show up. They were always nice though... All of our neighbors, friends and family would come to our house on the 4th. We didn't send out invitations. Everyone just knew to come, and each year more and more people would show up. We'd grill, have drinks, listen to great music..........and then at dark we'd do the fireworks. It was fun.
Thursday, July 03, 2008
work
So it's been 2 days back to work since my vacation.
The facility wasn't sold. The people leasing the business have agreed to stick around until Aug.1
I suspect that if we don't have a buyer by then, the patients will be transferred to other facilities, and we will close. I keep telling myself to feel something, but I don't.
The facility wasn't sold. The people leasing the business have agreed to stick around until Aug.1
I suspect that if we don't have a buyer by then, the patients will be transferred to other facilities, and we will close. I keep telling myself to feel something, but I don't.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
depressed
I feel a little bit depressed about having to go back to work tomorrow. I've racked my brain trying to find a way to not have to go back to work. I can't find one. The best I could come up with is to take some significant time off either this winter or next summer. But it's something I need to plan for.
HR called me today to let me know the new owners to be are fighting with the present owner and as of today, the business has yet to be sold. The people presently running the business are just leasing, and their lease ended as of yesterday. It's a major mess.
HR called me today to let me know the new owners to be are fighting with the present owner and as of today, the business has yet to be sold. The people presently running the business are just leasing, and their lease ended as of yesterday. It's a major mess.
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