sunday

I finally have all my Christmas decorations packed and put away. As I put them away I wondered to myself what the New Year might bring...............and because I've been going through whatever it is I'm going through, the thought of what the new year might bring kind of scares me.
I worry about dying, or about someone I love dying. I read somewhere that this worrying I've been doing about dying is a symptom of a mid-life crisis. Maybe it is, or maybe it's something else. I don't know.

I'm thinking about calling off work tomorrow. I just don't want to be there. I want to be at home. I want to be the one to take my daughter to school. I want to be able to have the time to cook a nice dinner for my family. I want to fiddle fart around the house, and around the yard. So I'm thinking that's what I'll do........I'll call in.....

Joplins probably not going to be coming home. I wish I could press my face up against his fur and give him a kiss. I miss him.