friday

I took boyfriend to the emergency room very early yesterday morning because he was having pretty bad pain when he took a breath.
They did their tests.............and just like that our whole world was turned upside down...........lung cancer...................fast growing mass in his left lung...............................we held each other in the little cubicle in the ER and we cried. Then we went home, held each other, and cried.
Boyfriend just keeps saying how grateful he is for the life that he has had, that he has had a great one. Then he cries when he worries out loud about leaving me behind.
I reassure him.
I'm so incredibly sad, and scared. All of our plans, all of our dreams, life as we know it.......gone.
My stomach and my heart aches....................